5 Ways to Get Your Teenager to Talk to You

Photo of an unsmiling Caucasian male teen wearing a GAP hoodie and standing outside with the sun setting behind him. Photo could represent a stressed and anxious teen and how receiving online therapy for anxiety in Illinois might be helpful.

Teen boy looking more confident. If you are wondering how to get your teenage to talk with you, then read on. You will learn some solution focused therapy techniques and some helpful tips. If your anxious teen needs more support, begin self-esteem counseling or anxiety treatment today!As a parent, it can be tough trying to get your teen to talk to you. Science has shown that the teenager’s brain has yet to fully develop the frontal cortex, which is the area that controls our ability to reason and to think before we act.

As your teen’s brain develops, they’re also learning new things about themselves and their surrounding world. Simultaneously, they’re dealing with hormonal changes beyond their control which can feel awkward and confusing.

Anxiety Can Cause Distance in Teens   

There’s no doubt that teens are facing a lot of challenges right now – COVID-19, remote learning or a hybrid version of school, social isolation, loss of dreams as well as relational, emotional, and financial stressors. These challenges can cause fear and anxiety in even the strongest of adolescents.

As parents, it can be really difficult to know how to help your child through this tough season, especially if they’re not doing much talking. It can feel bewildering at times for them and certainly for you as well. One day they’re chatting up a storm and the next, they’re quiet or combative. What’s a confused parent to do?

5 Ways to Get Your Teenager to Talk to You

While finding ways to talk to your teen or getting them to talk to you might be difficult, it’s not impossible. Here are 5 suggestions you can try.

Learn to Listen

Take the time to listen to your teen when they want to talk. Instead of saying that you’ll talk to themPeople standing together outside. When your teens isn't communicating, learning how to get your teenager to talk to you can take time. Learn from Helena Madsen, an online therapist in Chicago for tips to use. later, step away from what you’re doing and listen to what they have to say. Don’t talk, interrupt or be quick to offer advice; just listen.

Teens have thoughts and experiences that their parents don’t know about, and the best time to listen to them is when they’re asking to talk to you.

Put Yourself in Their Shoes

As you listen to your teen, your knee jerk response may be to quickly resolve their issue, offer advice or maybe even dismiss their complaints or opinions.

Instead, put yourself in your teen’s shoes. Think about how you would feel if your spouse responded to you in the way you respond to them.

Watch for Signs

Everyone has a desire to be heard and understood. As you talk to your teen, mirror back to them what you hear them saying. Watch for signs that they’re not being heard or understood by you.

They might roll their eyes, shake their head, wave their hand at you or interrupt. When they’re nodding and/or silent, you’ll know you’ve understood.

Ask Specific Questions

Instead of the general, “How was your day?”, why not ask about a friend you know by name? Or about a sport they participate in or a teacher they like?

Ask open-ended questions such as, “What was Mr. Burton’s class like today?” or “What was the best thing that happened today? What was the worst thing?”

Location, Location, Location

People eating meal together. If you're missing family connection with your teen, learning how to get your teenager to talk to you can help. If you believe they could use more support try online counseling for teens in illinois, chicago, champaign, springfield, and more!When and where you try to talk to your teen matters. One of the worst times to talk to teens is after school. Just like you do after work, they need time to wind down. Instead, ask questions around the dinner table. It’s casual and there’s no pressure for eye contact.

The car is another great place to talk to your teen (unless their friends are in the backseat). They tend to feel more comfortable talking in the car because you’re not looking directly at them.

Begin Online Counseling for Teens with Anxiety in Illinois

If you feel your teen could use some help with communication or with feelings of anxiety, it’s wise to seek support from a therapist.

Online therapy at Briefly Counseling can help. Anxiety or other emotional issues may feel overwhelming to your child but are treatable. Often having a hopeful conversation about feelings and specific ways to move forward is the best way to regain confidence and feel better emotionally.

As an experienced and caring therapist, I love providing online therapy. To start your child’s counseling journey, follow these simple steps:

  1. Click on the Schedule an Appointment button.
  2. Select a day and time in my online calendar
  3. Or learn about me, your caring online therapist 
  4. Watch your child gain confidence and feel better

Other Counseling Services at Briefly Counseling

Anxiety counseling for teens isn’t the only service I offer in my Chicago and Illinois online counseling practice. Other mental health services provided by Briefly Counseling includes anxiety counseling for kids and Christian counseling.

Helena Madsen, MA, LCPC is the founder of Briefly Counseling. I specialize in providing online short-term anxiety treatment for kids and teens ages 7 – 19.

I provide all services via online therapy in Illinois. Whether you’re in Naperville, Chicago, Champaign, Rockford, Libertyville, or Crystal Lake, I can help you. Schedule your appointment or consultation today. I look forward to working with your child to quickly and effectively help them in activating their strengths, resources, and resilience, in order to live with confidence and hope.

Visit my website at www.BrieflyCounseling.com for more information or call 224-236-2296 to connect with me personally.